To honor this great American tradition of exchanging breaded for barren chicken, poutine for protein shakes, beers for bicep curls, and cheese dip for chest press, I thought I would search around to try and find the most impressive biceps on each team and put them up against each other… but then something very strange happened to this post. Read on…
This post got off to a bad start because this is the only picture of a Steeler I could find flexing his bicep. So already I’m thinking the Packers have this one on lock:
I started by thinking that Clay Matthews was a shoe in for Green Bay. The dude is always pulling out the Front Double Biceps pose and killing it. I had to do my due diligence though so I kept searching. I found a contender 10 jersey numbers up at #62 Evan Dietrich-Smith. His biceps are MASSIVE. Arms like goddamn tree trunks, but they lack the definition that defines Clay’s gorgeous ‘ceps. I was about to dismiss #62 on account of poor definition, when I found this picture, and that is when this post took a hard left turn.
There are so many amazing things going on in this picture.
- The fat Ryan Reynolds doppelganger in the background
- Evan Dietrich-Smith’s Left Arm. You get an idea as to the scale of Dietrich-Smith’s biceps. I am pretty sure they are the same circumference as this reporter’s waist.
- And that reporter! Who the fuck are you? Regular reporters don’t have guns like that. Chick puts most guys to shame. Check out this other picture from Media Day:
What the fuck is going on here? I need to find this chick and get her to put me in a headlock. Who ARE YOU!?!? What are you? Strangle me! The caption says your name is Rebeca Rubio, I’ve never heard of you. Now I am going to Google (Images) the shit out of you. And to the victor go the spoils, I’d like to introduce to you the winner of the Super Bicep Bowl Sunday:
Rebeca Rubis, Miss Fitness Guatemala
Tight ass, then your eyes make your way down her legs and you see quads that could crush your cock into guacamole.
There is something unnerving about a bicep vein almost as good as mine.
Pull-Up contest? (*vomits in mouth*)
She is laughing because her tricep could punch you in the face.
