This is Russian bodybuilder Alexey Lesukov:
And this is Russian bodybuilder Alexey Lesukov on his way to the gym:
The Gains Gremlins don’t stand a chance when Alexey is riding his Segway.
Notice the complete lack of cardiovascular exercise. This is why Lesukov is a pro and you are not; his commitment to the anti-cardio is unparallelled.
The Gains are strong in this one.
-Tony “Two Scoops" Muscoli
Thanks to @hittin_bricks for making this.
But this one goes all the way to 11 (I am getting really good with Microsoft Paint).
- Tony
Abstract:
Steele J, Fisher J, McGuff D, Bruce-Low S, Smith D. Resistance Training to Momentary Muscular Failure Improves Cardiovascular Fitness in Humans: A Review of Acute Physiological Responses and Chronic Physiological Adaptations. JEPonline 2012;15(3):53-80.
Research demonstrates resistance training produces significant improvement in cardiovascular fitness (VO2 max, economy of movement). To date no review article has considered the underlying physiological mechanisms that might support such improvements. This article is a comprehensive, systematic narrative review of the literature surrounding the area of resistance training, cardiovascular fitness and the acute responses and chronic adaptations it produces. The primary concern with existing research is the lack of clarity and inappropriate quantification of resistance training intensity. Thus, an important consideration of this review is the effect of intensity. The acute metabolic and molecular responses to resistance training to momentary muscular failure do not differ from that of traditional endurance training. Myocardial function appears to be maintained, perhaps enhanced, in acute response to high intensity resistance training, and contraction intensity appears to mediate the acute vascular response to resistance training. The results of chronic physiological adaptations demonstrate that resistance training to momentary muscular failure produces a number of physiological adaptations, which may facilitate the observed improvements in cardiovascular fitness. The adaptations may include an increase in mitochondrial enzymes, mitochondrial proliferation, phenotypic conversion from type IIx towards type IIa muscle fibers, and vascular remodeling (including capillarization). Resistance training to momentary muscular failure causes sufficient acute stimuli to produce chronic physiological adaptations that enhance cardiovascular fitness. This review appears to be the first to present this conclusion and, therefore, it may help stimulate a changing paradigm addressing the misnomer of ‘cardiovascular’ exercise as being determined by modality.Link to Author’s blog: James Steele
I knew it! I fucking knew it! I’ve been saying it for YEARS and finally I have found scientific proof that you NEVER HAVE TO DO CARDIO AGAIN. And this is science bitches. Not fake science. Not shit I make up. Not hyperbolic assertions. Real fuckin’ science.
This article was published in the Official Research Journal of the American Society of Exercise Physiologists. Everybody who works there has a PhD. I counted 19 members on the review board for this publication, plus an Editor-in-Chief. If you count the five authors of the scientific paper, you are brought to a grand total of 25 PhDs that approved of this research that says, and I paraphrase: “weightlifting alone will improve your cardiovascular fitness."
Therefore, one can conclude that traditional “Cardio" exercises are for the uneducated - science says so.
-Tony “I Told You So" Muscoli
Reader Email:
Tony, I am training for a triathlon to get shredded for this summer. My question is, are triathlons badass? I know your opinions on cardio, but an Ironman Triathlon doesn’t have the word “Ironman" in it for nothing.
- Stew Swole
I will admit that alone, the word "Ironman" makes one envision an unbreakable Roman statue of a proud and hardened warrior. Ironman conjures up visions of a man in peak athletic form, avatars of heroism, of muscle and might, of endurance, and of Robert Downey Jr.
But alas, when the once proud word Ironman is nary but a prefix for the inevitable "Triathlon," the adjuction of such diminishes all the heroism of the famed word "Ironman" to nothing more than delusions of grandeur.
Professional Triathlete Jordan Rapp here has the arms of a Goddess.
For you see, an iron man is by definition, “a strong man of exceptional physical endurance." However, a triathlon is, by its most popular definition, an endurance competition of swimming, running, and cycling. Triathlons utilize not one, not two, but THREE separate forms of cardio, and therefore are three times as bad for you as regular cardio.
Anybody who reads this website knows, that cardio is the Devil. Increasing the distance of these cardiovascular exercises to Ironman proportions will garner you no further accolades from this establishment.
I could end my argument there: Triathlons are cardio. Don’t do them. End of story. But I want to dig a little deeper with my closing statement:
When you are at the beach, or the club, or a cocktail hour, or an office holiday party, or really any venue where it is appropriate for you to take your shirt off, and you are standing next to a triathlete, he/she will look lean and fit, but they are nothing special until they opens their mouth to brag about their triathleteness. The triathlete’s necessity for braggadocio puts themselves at risk of looking like a giant D-bag because they are at the office holiday party shirtless, bragging about how they ran a marathon in soggy spandex.
Meanwhile, Two Scoopers don’t have to brag about their latest race for validation. A Two Scooper just looks like the calm collected stud by the bar, letting his delts do the talking.
Triathletes are either scrawny, or not good triathletes, or both. Case closed.
-Tony “Two Scoops" Muscoli
It’s the best excuse I can come up with.
At least once a day I am asked about cardio, so I am going finally set the record straight.
"LOL. I have no idea what I am doing."
The question I receive most often from the treadmill hoes, is “Tony, you really don’t do any cardio?"
And the answer is always, “No. I do not."
Cardio will stunt your growth. For you see, the repetitive body movements of traditional cardiovascular exercises cause the participant to maintain an elevated heart rate for an extended period of time. These extended periods of elevated heart rate will adjust the body’s energy output to a catabolic state (tissue burning), versus the anabolic state (tissue building) we need to build muscle.
When in a state of catabolism, the body draws its energy sources in the following order:
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When the body has burned through its stores of carbohydrates (stage 1) and fats (stage 2), it transfers into a state of mass catabolism, wherein the body will begin to utilize its own muscular tissue as a primary energy source (stage 3).
It is generally recognized throughout the strength training industry that medium-to-high intensity cardiovascular exercise exceeding durations of approximately one hour will initiate Stage 3, muscle catabolism.
I like to play it safe, by keeping the duration of my cardio sessions to under one set of 6-8 reps. The only exception to this: I’ll go for a 10 minute run once every couple months just to make sure I can still do it. Though, I am always sure to follow Two Scoops Running Protocol whenever I do run.
Somebody playing devil’s advocate would undoubtedly ask, “but Tony, what about all the health benefits of cardio? You need to raise your heart rate once in a while if you want to train the most important muscle in your body, your heart."
And to these people I say, “you know what else raises your heart rate?… Caffeine and Cocaine."
Caffeine is basically what this blog is built on. If I go a week without writing a post, then you know I have run out of pre-workouts. I have not been taking my daily two scoops of Jack3d, and I am therefore too tired and lazy to write anything.
Caffeine is the single most widely researched supplement in the world, and its positive affects on exercise and physical performance are well documented and undisputed.
When people are concerned that “if you are not doing cardio, you are not exercising your heart," they are being naïve. Over the course of a day I take enough caffeine to overload a defibrillator, so I am pretty sure I get my heart rate up.
You have to be careful though, taking too little caffeine can actually lower your heart rate!
Research reported by Isabella Sudano, M.D. et al. in MedScape Nurses News, indicates that the caffeine in coffee can both increase and decrease the heart rate. A moderate dose of coffee—-about 250mg of caffeine—reduces the heart rate, but higher doses can produce increased rates. Increased rates are more likely to occur in people who don’t usually drink coffee. The reason for these different results is that caffeine also affects blood pressure; when the blood pressure increases—-which it does after a dose of caffeine—-the heart rate slows. But higher doses of caffeine can trigger the neurotransmitters norepinephrine and epinephrine, and that can cause an increased heart rate no matter what the blood pressure is.
What is a higher dose of caffeine? The Mayo Clinic suggests that “more than 500 to 600mg a day can cause insomnia, nervousness and fast heartbeat."
BOOM! 500+mg of caffeine = fast heartbeat, according to The Mayo Clinic (and my arrhythmia). That is science. Not broscience, REAL FUCKING SCIENCE.
And I am not even done yet.
After my caffeine induced cardiovascular adventure at the gym, I come home and get ready for the evening… by doing a bunch of cocaine.
According to WebMD, “Cocaine increases heart rate and blood pressure while constricting the arteries supplying blood to the heart. The result can be a heart attack, even in young people without heart diseas…" blah blah blah forget the last part. What we need to focus on is the increased heart rate.
Now when I say, “do a bunch of cocaine," I am not talking about splitting a bag with a few of my friends, I am talking Johnny Depp in the last hour of Blow… then I go to the club. As far as you should be concerned, 4 straight hours of cocaine dancing to techno is more of a cardio workout than any amount of stationary biking.
Imagine this as your daily cardio plan (cardio exercises are noted in parenthesis):
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Following this cardio plan, from 2pm in the afternoon until the coke finally wears off at 8am, you will have an irregularly fast heartbeat. Therefore, this cardio plan allows for 18 straight hours of elevated heart rate. That is a big "FUCK YOU" to all the people who say that you are ignoring your heart health by not doing cardio. You are basically doing cardio for 75% of the day!
"I have done entirely too much cocaine…"
Now when people ask if you do cardio, you can snort a Monster, chug some cocaine, and say “yea, I just did."
-Tony “Two Scoops" Muscoli
Most people would see this man at the gym and see a guy on bath salts wearing athletic shorts. I see a fitness prodigy.
Let’s break down this PCP addict’s workout routine into his most effective and groundbreaking maneuvers:
This critical ab-blasting move engages the abdominal muscles by not actually engaging them at all.
Inverted Turkish Spaghetti Legs are great for loosening up the hip flexors, and causing irreparable vertebrae damage.
What do you lift when you can rack the machine? You lift the whole machine. This guy is an innovator.
The Reverse Lunging Self-Cockpunch really separates the men from the boys. You used to see this move a lot in the late 1980s in NorthSouthern Iraq. It takes balls of steel to hammer out the last few reps.
Hopefully you can take away from this articlesome valuable new moves to add to your workout routines.
-Tony “Two Scoops" Muscoli
(Source: supplement-junkie)
